Purpletigron

Good books.
Massage.
Lots of hugs from loved ones, and plenty of cat-petting.
Plenty of water.
If baths help you relax, have a bath every evening (you can save the water for the garden).
Meditation.
Just zoning out and daydreaming.
Watching lots of good comedy.
Good sex.
Dancing.
Goofing around.

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Apparently, penetrative sex is the stress-reliever. Who'd have thunk?

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If it's OK with you, I'm going to assume that this rider is heterosexist rubbish for now :-) My guess is that human beings are clever enough to trick their bodies with all kinds of imaginative sex :-)

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A while ago, they were positing that some component in sperm boosted mental well-being. I'm caught between a rock and a hard place here. I mean, there are so many possible factors involved - and who knows but that there might actually be truth in the idea that semen contains stuff that makes women happy? But human sexuality is so damn complicated. Is it as simple as a chemical compound that gets absorbed into the lining of the vagina into the bloodstream? Is it about how turned on partners are? Is it about the level of honesty and communication in a partnership? Did they study men who are in sexual relationships exclusively with other men or women who are exclusively with women? Does the penetrative bit hold true when it's not a penis doing the penetrating? Given that many women cannot achieve orgasm through penetration, but can achieve lots of the buggers through clitoral stimulation, you'd have thought that oral sex would be the clear winner. How were they defining "sex"?

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Exactly! I have just one word to say: Condoms.

Actually, I also have, "fellatio to male orgasm" :-)

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Well, well, well (3 holes in the ground). Lucky bugger!

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I meant I also had that phrase to say

Your final noun should be plural :-)</small.

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From what the article says, their sample is really too small to say anything very much, and if these other possibilities were included then it would make any result completely unclear. Having said that, though, these initial results are an indication that more needs to be done, and all these other possibilities need to be investigated.

Now - any volunteers out there??????

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I can see that I'm going to have to be quite assertive in this programme to Take Care of Myself. Current self-assessment:

o My fluid intake is reasonable. But I realise that my taste for plain water is low at the moment (it comes out of the tap icy cold).
o Cat petting ... check!
o I zone and goof on the Internet, to the point of 'addiction' :-(
o Lonely means: no one for hugs, or massage, or shared sex :-((
o I need comfort reading: decided to start again on Pratchett for now.
o I'm crap at relaxing, even in the bath. Never learned to mediate.
o I rarely go near the TV on my own - something else better shared.
o I do confuse the cats by bopping to the music in my head, sometimes.

Overall assessment: Poor :-(

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We filter our tap water because it's obnoxious; we put it in a jug on the counter, and drink it at room temperature, which your body finds easier to cope with anyway.

I have found that being on the internet and relaxation are not the same thing at all. I find that surfing the web can be fun and addictive, but it is not restful - reading a book is more relaxing than reading the same book online.

Do you have friends in the area? Would they be up for a night a week of potluck dinner and a giggle?

Never learned to meditate? Now's the perfect time! Take 5 minutes, sit comfortably, close your eyes and concentrate on your breath. When you find your mind wandering, say to yourself, "Thinking!" and mentally smile, then go back to your breath. Remember, meditation's a process, not a goal.

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Hmm - so I could pour myself some water in the morning, say... hmm!

Being on the Internet is definitely not the same as relaxing. I really do think that I'm addicted :-(

I'm really only on 'dinner and a giggle' terms with N&S. I worry about imposing heavily upon them :-(

That sounds like Pema Chodron :-)

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Have you asked N&S if they think this would be an imposition?

You'd think I'd read some of Pema's stuff or something... ;)

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I went out with N last night - S, G & D are alway away :-S

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yonmei.livejournal.com

One of the most helpful diet advices I've had is to think of the "five portions of fruit or veg a day" as a basic minimum, and to aim for eight or nine. Which means I can get to feel self-indulgent and know I'm taking good care of myself - because it really does help: I've had fewer colds this year than I recollect ever having before. (That's if you like fruit-and-veg. I do.)

Hugs are always good.

Taking time to daydream on the sofa with a purring cat.

Reading books/watching TV that makes you laugh - really laugh, helplessly though it hurts.

Going for walks. (This may be just me...)

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artela.livejournal.com

For the last 2 months I've been trying to eat more healthily, including the "at least 5 portions of fruit or veg a day" malarky (which is difficult as there are lots of veg I can't stand, and only a few fruit I'm fond of) - consequently I've had more bleedin' colds this winter than I've ever had before in one winter season!

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yonmei.livejournal.com

Ah well, I'm a vegetarian. :-) So in effect, making sure I was eating 8 or 9 portions of fresh fruit/veg meant "avoiding processed food", and "not ODing on cheese or eggs".

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artela.livejournal.com

Ah - I'm one of those "if we were meant to be vegetarian cooked meat wouldn't smell or taste so good" types myself ;-)

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yonmei.livejournal.com

Ah - I'm one of those "cooking meat sometimes smells good but it always tastes horrid" vegetarians. :-)

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The colds result from you failing to do 5 portions?

How are you with 'hidden' fruit and veg? Like, Jamie Oliver sneaking vegetables in to children? Could you make e.g. a pureed nine-veg pasta sauce which would appeal?

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The colds have resulted _since_ I've been making sure I'm getting a minimum of 5 portions of F&V a day!

There are some veg that make me feel physically sick, and even a small quantity "sneaked in" I can taste (like celery and parsley) *ick*

The list of veg I *will* eat is shorter than that of the veg I won't eat :-/

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Good call on the fruit and vegetables. The weekly veg box helps, as do farmers markets, and home-made soup and smoothies. But I'm always much more inclined to do balanced meals when they'll be shared ... :-S

I've been feeling extremely hug-starved since I last saw my boys on Monday ;-( (Don't really have anyone around on hugging terms otherwise.)

I never daydream with a purring cat. Hmm...

I laughed helplessly at the Goodies, "Saturday Night Grease" on my new DVD :-) I'm stuck in a weird place with books - I feel too guilty about wasting time unless it's in bed at night...

Not just you: Walks, and cycle rides, v. good.

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But I'm always much more inclined to do balanced meals when they'll be shared ... :-S

I tend to this. BUT! a nicely prepared meal for yourself is so, so, so worth the effort. It just makes you feel so much happier.

I'm stuck in a weird place with books - I feel too guilty about wasting time unless it's in bed at night...

You're not wasting time, you're investing in your mental and emotional well-being, thereby ensuring greater productivity and physical health over the long term, so there.

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I realise that I actually hvae no idea whether a nicely prepared meal would make me feel happy - I've never done one for myself! My inner voice predicts, "not worth the effort" :-(((

Not feeling good about the long term... sorry!

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brixtonbrood.livejournal.com

Sleep. This may mean cutting down on alcohol and caffeine and night-time computer use.
Sunlight. Especially at this time of year.
Sex (when in doubt).

You seem to be doing all the right things on diet and exercise, so no tips there.

My top tip, if you suspect any mood links with your hormonal cycle is Vitamin B6. I attribute the survival un-knifed of the rest of the household to my daily 50mg.

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anthraxia.livejournal.com

Definately have to agree with this one. B group vitamins are your friend. Malt is good (has lots of iron in an easily digestible form too), as is Vegemite (oh alright, just because you're British, Marmite).

Getting enough water is another good one; the days when I forget to drink enough I find I don't cope with stuff and I get clumsy (as well as a headache).

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Actually, I've taken to using a health shop brand, because Marmite doesn't come in low salt. I can say with confidence that no two yeast extracts taste even similar - Vegemite and Marmite are simply two well-known demonstration cases...

I spend far too much time in front of the computer seeking enlightenment, company or just distraction. I mean, waay, waay too much time. To the extent that I let myself get cold, hungry, thirsty and exhausted. Wow. That sounds even worse when I write it down, than it did realising it. But I'm so lonely when I'm offline :-(

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We cannot have you lonely. This will not do. So, books are good. Books are always our friends. Plus there must be people in your area with overlapping interests. Look them up! Take a deep breath and check out local groups that seem to be of interest to you. And what of your neighbours? Are they awful? Or can you at least pass the time of day with a smile and some small talk?

When we move, we will know my family's old friends, but we will know no-one in our own age-group, of our religion, etc., except those people we have talked to online. We have worked up a plan and hope to enforce it: We shall get those handy children's guides to flora and fauna and go for walks to see what our environment's like. We shall look into local conservation and social justice groups. We shall invite all the neighbours round to a housewarming. We shall make a point of smiling and chatting to people in shops. It is hard to get out of a rut, and kind of scary, but what do you have to lose but loneliness?

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Sleep Excellent! Sadly, I'm hardly taking any alcohol or caffeine :-( I hold up my hands to spending waaay too much time on the computer, but I have to be very down to stay online past 21:30.

Sunlight: not good, spending far too much time at the computer pretending that I'm doing something useful :-(

Sex: no one to share with :-(

I try to put yeast extract in everything appropriate. My monthly mood cycles seem to be in addition to the underlying problems, though. That said, my household do sometimes get knifed...

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frandowdsofa.livejournal.com

If it worked for Slough, it can work for you! (I just started looking at this in detail today, for us.)

http://www.bbc.co.uk/lifestyle/tv_and_radio/making_slough_happy/manifesto.shtml

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It's a nice list, but there's little new on there for me ... apart from the bits about giving myself time to appreciate and enjoy stuff...

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Ages ago, I read about the idea of a daily litany of things to be grateful for. It's not about pretending that the shitty stuff doesn't matter, but about looking at the things you're lucky to have. I took to reciting mine in the mornings when lighting the incense on my shrine (which I find makes me feel much better when I do it daily):

I am grateful that I and those I love have had another day in the world.
I am grateful that I have a husband, family, and friends I love.
I am grateful that I can sleep nowadays.
I am grateful for fresh veggies and fruit and pasta and hummus and such.
I am grateful that I have a home, and clothes on my back.
I am grateful that I have health insurance.
I am grateful that so many people have put great resources for ethical living online and into print.
I am grateful for all the wonderful authors and artists and playwrights and actors and singers whose work I enjoy.
I am grateful for the funny little peeper frogs in the marshy land behind the apartment complex.
I am grateful for the fact that humans come in so many shapes and colours for me to admire.
I am grateful for orange juice.
I am grateful for sudoku.
I am grateful for crosswords.
I am grateful for detective fiction.
I am grateful for sunshine on leaves.

And the more things I think of to be grateful for, the more pop into my mind, and it puts me in a really good mood. Just concentrating on good stuff is a bit of a tonic in itself. And when you think of yourself as a blessed person, and make yourself think that way, it cheers you up no end. Here's my starter list of things I think you're blessed for:

You're blessed with great intelligence.
You're blessed with great compassion and humanity.
You're blessed with being insightful.
You're blessed with clear critical thinking.
You're blessed with a mother and two partners who love you.
You're blessed with two cats.
You're blessed with enough to eat and a place to live in.
You're blessed with a sense of humour.
You're blessed with people online who really like you, even if they don't know you "IRL".
You're blessed with a sense of justice.
You're blessed with having a garden.
You're blessed with a good GP who listens to you.
You're blessed with a knack for adventurous cooking.
You're blessed with a love of learning.
You're blessed with being able to dance to music in your head.

Just to kick you off, like.

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Bless me :-)

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fjm.livejournal.com

Have you been to Drucker's opposite St. Martin's in the Bullring? It's the best cake shop outside of Vienna.

And take a bus to Canon Hill Park and feed the ducks. Then go check out what craft stuff they are doing.

(Both of these places define my childhood.)

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The ducks are doing craft stuff?????

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Making eiderdowns. Some are tying up smaller ducks and force-plucking them for their projects, but that's because they're mallardjusted.

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I am in pain...

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sammywol.livejournal.com

This is a slightly fivolous suugestion but, given your love of chocolate, have you tried Lush's 'Sonic Death Monkey' shampoo/gel. (I seem to remember you were the one who put me on to Lush many moons ago so this may well be old news.) It has a very powerful kick of coffee and chocolate to it and when inhaled in the hot steam of a shower does wonders for my energy levels and state of mind. If only I could get more of that Body Shop chocolate orange body butter for afterwards I would be all snug and wrapped up in an endorphin blanket.

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Citrus scents also boost your mood. I know that lemon and orange essential oils sprayed around the room make a difference, and you can clean windows by rubbing newspaper with lemon essential oil drops on it directly onto the glass; when the sun shines through, it warms up the oil and releases the scent. You can also mix some in with bicarb and put it in your hoover bag so it's released when you're hoovering, or use lemon/orange-scented cleaning products. Don't put citrus oils on your skin if you're going out in the sunshine, though, as it encourages burns.

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